When you are on any journey of change, you will face resistance. It is one of the only constants you can expect from life, and if you are to move forward in making your change, you need to determine a strategy to deal with it. In today’s post, I want to teach you how to keep your motivation to change, and how to keep going in times of push back.
I want to encourage you that resistance is normal, everyone faces it! The secret to growth is how you deal with it.
How to Move Past Resistance
1.) Identify Where Resistance is Coming From
This is arguably the most important step because depending on where the resistance is coming from, you will deal with it differently. Resistance can show up as negative or unsupportive comments from family, friends, or even people on social media. If possible, you need to cut it out of your life. You can’t accomplish goals with no support group, and you’re unlikely to be successful if everyone you’re surrounded with is telling you that you can’t. This can, of course, be difficult with family, so first explain to them that you need their support. Let them know that they are really hurting your journey. If they love you, they will change their actions.
Resistance can also come from yourself. Check your emotions and your thought patterns. You need to be supporting yourself! After all, if you don’t believe in yourself, who will? Really meditate on the Word of God because through Him, we are able to do any and everything (Philippians 4:13)!
2.) Work Through Negative Emotions
Going off of the first point, you need to work through your negative emotions. Most Christians get stuck when they face resistance because they view it as a sign that they are doing something wrong. That is simply not true. We are all human. Negative emotions are simply a part of life and the change process.
Stay plugged into God, and be sure that He is guiding your steps. Don’t be fooled into thinking resistance is the Holy Spirit telling you to stop, though!
3.) Experience Growth
To move past the stage of resistance, growth has to take place. This can be scary! Most people live and die in a non-growth environment. What I mean by that is that we get stuck in our routine, and we don’t challenge ourselves. You know, God called Abraham out of his comfortable place and told him to GO (Genesis 12)! That journey was a true experience of growth, and it’s something God calls us all to.
Having negative emotions or facing resistance isn’t what displeases God. What displeases Him is our refusal to dealing with them!
I counseled a woman who had been married and divorced four times – every time to an alcoholic. When I talked with her, I pressed her, “What is it about you that is attracted to men who drink?” This woman had some kind of deep, hindering belief about herself that caused her to experience the same kind of unwanted change over and over again. If she would have been willing to cooperate with the Holy Spirit in identifying and changing this belief, things could have been different in her life.
Instead, she followed the same pattern: every time she experience the crisis of a divorce, she would begin the process of feeling the loss, breaking through denial and would enter the stage of resistance. Then, she would stop. Rather than pushing through her negative emotions of anger and depression, she would just start looking for a new husband. You have to endure through the resistance to get to the other side!
I sincerely hope this post has helped you to be able to deal with resistance on your change journey. What have you found to be successful in your experience? Let me know in the comments below!
If you are interested in learning more about mastering change, I encourage you to get my new book, Change Mastery, here!